WINTER IS HERE!

WINTER IS HERE – AND IT’S ANGRY

Alright everyone, after eight long seasons, the Night King and his army of the dead have finally descended on Winterfell, and one of the major battles of the entire series is finally going to be resolved.

Given George R R Martin’s dislike of “plot armor,” (the need to keep heroes alive for a happy ending), I’m expecting a lot of carnage from tonight’s episode. I thought the last episode was beautifully written, with some great character moments from all of our favorites. I loved the various secondary characters all sitting in front of the fire together just talking about whatever came to their heads, because in a few hours it wouldn’t matter anyway. I also got a little emotional over Brienne finally getting her wish and being officially knighted, and it was great to see Podric and Tyrion back together again.

So, who will to make it to end of the long night? Let’s lay it all out and see who is likely to live, and who is going to march with the army of the dead (in alphabetical order):

Arya: Too badass to die from a measly zombie. Besides, she needs to kill Cersei after this battle.

Beric: Could go either way. Old one-eye hasn’t been brought back from the dead just to fall in battle, but he could die heroically sacrificing himself to save another character. Will probably be killed by a White Walker.

Bran: The Three Eyed Raven! To be honest, I’m leaning towards death. Now that he’s spilled the beans over Jon’s true identity, he’s not really needed. My bet is for him to die warging the Night King’s undead dragon.

Brienne: Again, just too awesome to die. Unfortunately, she just got her life-long wish, so I think Martin is sizing up Sir Brienne for a heroic death.

Clegane: Apart from the fact that he’s practically unkillable, we still need to have CLEGANEBOWL! I can’t wait to see him fighting against zombie Mountain.

Davos: Sweet, dependable, Davos is the ”Dad” of the series. True to his trader past, he’s just drifted from one battle to another, trying to do the right thing. Sorry everyone, I’m betting the Onion Night is toast.

Eddison: Ed the last Commander of the Night’s Watch. Plot-wise, there’s no reason for him to live, but considering that he’s already survived the White Walkers before, I think he’ll pull through.

Gendry: The honest man who works with his hands, and the new love interest of Arya. To be honest, a mallet is a terrible weapon for fast-moving undead who never feel pain or get tired, so I’m not betting on him living through this.

Gilly: I love how much this character has grown, and I think she’s going to end up playing a pivotal role in the Crypts during the battle. Honestly, who thought putting the non-combatants in a crypt would be a good idea when the Night King can literally RAISE THE DEAD? She’s going to live.

Grey Worm: Uh-oh, all the signs are there. He spoke about retiring somewhere warm with Missandei before a climatic battle. If this was a cop show, he would be the police captain who has one week left until retirement. Sorry Worm fans, but I don’t think he’s going to make it.

Jamie: Either you love him or you hate him. Again, Jamie has one of the best character arcs in this series. The only thing left to do with his character is to kill Cersei, but I’ve placed my bets on that being Arya. My prediction is that Jamie will die, but he might survive if they want to up the stakes.

Jorah: Our favorite tragic hero. Considering what he’s been through, I was going to peg him as a survivor, but Samwell gave Jorah the Tarly family sword – which suggests a heroic, symbolic death. As much as I like the long-suffering Sir Jorah, Daenerys needs to lose someone close to her. Jorah could just be it.

Missandei: Intelligent, cultured and perceptive, the former slave has grown into a moderating force on Daenerys’ growing authoritarianism. I think she’ll survive to be the new queen’s conscience.

Podrick: Credit where credit is due; I never thought Pod would live this long. He’s even become a competent swordsman under Brienne’s tutelage. I can’t make up my mind on whether Podrick Payne will live – but I hope he does.

Samwell: The scared Night Watch recruit who now kills White Walkers and romances beautiful women. I love his character development, but considering he’s now confirmed Jon’s new identity, there’s not much left for him to do. It would be nice for him to survive and become the royal family’s Maester, but I wouldn’t bet on it…

Sansa: Arguably the toughest character in the entire goddamn series. She may not be able to swing a sword, but she’s survived and even came out on top when it felt like the entire world was against her. Sansa will live, to continue being the Stark presence in the north after the battle. Whether she’ll have anything left to rule is another matter.

Tormund: The Giantsbane, and no, I’m not going into the giantess story. As much as I’d love for the Wildling to earn Brienne’s heart, he’s another character who hasn’t got much left to offer plot-wise apart from a noble death. It’d be great so see him face off against the Night King though.

Tyrion: Every fan’s favorite, who also has an amazing character development through the series. I would say that the plot Armour is strong enough for him to survive, but then again Martin might kill him off just to screw with us – can you imagine the nerd rage over this? Let’s take a halfway position: I don’t think both Jamie AND Tyrion will survive to face off against Cersei. So if one dies, the other will live.

Varys: The Spider has kept pretty much in the background lately, so I wouldn’t rely on him to do anything dramatic. If anyone knows how to stay quiet and survive, it’s going to be Varys. Besides, he will be of more use in a face-off against Cersei.

The obvious pair that I’ve left off the list is Daenerys and Jon. Let’s be honest, the plot armor is strongest with these two, and Jon has already died once! Now that Jon has a legitimate claim to the Iron Throne (and might be a more compassionate, flexible ruler than Danny), it’s possible that Martin might kill off the Mother of Dragons and let Jon take the throne – but I doubt it. Their pets, on the other hand? I’m expecting to see at least one dragon fall, and considering Ghost has re-appeared after a lengthy absence, I’m thinking this is only to make it painful when the white wolf dies.

Those are my theories, if you have your own bets on who will survive the Battle of Winterfell, then please post your comments below! We’ll do another wrap-up later on this week and see if I got any guesses right.

Extra bonus: Where the HELL is Melisandre? Wasn’t standing against the evil ice zombies with her (admittedly creepy) fire/sex powers supposed to be literally her entire reason for existing? I’m not saying she’s a heroic character, but if there was going to be someone standing on the wall when the zombies attack, I thought it would be her.